Murphy’s Laws for Teaching

The clock in the instructor’s room will be wrong.
Disaster will occur when visitors are in the room.
A subject interesting to the teacher will bore students.
The time a teacher takes in explaining is inversely proportional to the information retained by students.
A meeting’s length will be directly proportional to the boredom the speaker produces.
Students who are doing better are credited with working harder. If children start to do poorly, the teacher will be blamed.
The problem child will be a school board member’s son.
When the instructor is late, he will meet the principal in the hall.
If the instructor is late and does not meet the principal, the instructor is late to the faculty meeting.
New students come from schools that do not teach anything.
Good students move away.
When speaking to the school psychologist, the teacher will say “weirdo” rather than “emotionally disturbed”.
The school board will make a better pay offer before the teacher’s union negotiates.
The instructor’s study hall be the largest in several years.
The administration will view the study hall as the teacher’s preparation time.
Clocks will run more quickly during free time.
On a test day, at least 15% of the class will be absent
If the instructor teaches art, the principal will be an ex-coach and will dislike art. If the instructor is a coach, the principal will be an ex-coach who took a winning team to the state.